Things are changing

Certainly things are changing right before my very eyes. My life is just a cluster and I just cannot seem to get out of the rut I have put myself in. I thought that I would be a welcome part of my family but I have found that I am, as my daughter has referred to me as, a burden that they do not want to have to take care of. I was unaware that I left that impression but apparently I have. I don't want to be a burden to anyone and I just don't know how to get out of all this mess. I think that there are jobs out there to be had with my experience but with all the rejections I am getting a little depressed. It is bringing me to a place that isn't good. I know that things are changing but I didn't think that it would be so bad as to keep me from moving forward...Maybe I am the problem. I will look at myself and find an answer to this situation.

Now in regards to the topic my daughter spoke about. I have noticed for a long time now that I have not been someone that she welcomes into her family. Her in-laws are closer to her than myself.  I don't want to bring all my chaos into their family.

I hope that I can turn things around so that I will be in a better place. I need to do this for myself.